didihearthereadyset:

didihearthereadyset:

didihearthereadyset:

didihearthereadyset:

I have a really hot waiter.

Guys he came back with my food and said, “Careful the plate is hot too.” So I asked, “too?” and hE TOUCHED MY SHOULDER THEN MADE A SIZZLING NOISE.
IM FREAKING OUT WHAT DO I DO.

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wanna know what these all say?

"suck his dick"

(Source: racingbarakarts, via lovebrandonlee)

So one of my best friends had a medieval fantasy wedding

congalineofdurin:

at a hella cool castle

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the groom channeled Thranduil and the Baratheons

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the bridesmaids were elf maidens

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the court jester and town crier were there

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the cakes were gorgeous

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luckily a friar was passing through town who was able to officiate (“mawwaige,” he said, “is what bwings us togevver today”)

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the bride’s chariot was pulled by the most beautiful creature

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unfortunately, as with all medieval weddings, there is the dragon problem

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(via katbrion)

starweilder:

trying to figure out someone else’s shower

(via tyleroakley)